Things I will eyeroll if you put it in your fic

[transemacabre]

1. Fishing-for-compliments. "Omigod, this fanfic is so bad, I'm sorry, I shouldn't even be posting this!" If you say something like that about your own work, you know what? I'm gonna believe you. Yeah, your fanfic probably sucks and you should probably have kept it to yourself.

2. M/M sex scenes where one half of the slash pairing thinks to himself how, at last, he can be as rough as he wants to be because his sex partner is a big tough man and not some fragile woman. Um, have you ever had sex with a woman? Women are not china dolls. If you fuck a woman vigorously, her leg will not pop off or something. And a penis isn't a battering ram, for fuck's sake.

3. "Blown pupils". Has any turn of phrase ever metatastized across fandom so quickly and so widely?

Comments

[carolinelamb.livejournal.com]

Oh true, blown pupils! I've read them! And I'm sure I've committed enough "dilated pupils" et al for a life time to not be allowed to laugh! But still ... I thought the same thing recently when I had a fanfic reading day and read that in almost EVERY fic, I had bookmarked. Interestingly across all qualities, from barely legible bad fic to eloquent, sharp master piece. Blown pupils wherever one looked ... :D

When did this madness even start?

Re: Bad fic: Cringes (a little ;) I did post fics where I did mention the badfic!quality as a sort of warning and in a "sorry (but not really)" way. I always feel it's better to over-warn than to under-warn!

If you fuck a woman vigorously, her leg will not pop off or something.

Hahaha! <3!

[redcandle17.livejournal.com]

"Blown pupils"

What does that even mean?!

[mrasaki.livejournal.com]

Personally, I hate "this is probably OOC!" and "un-betaed, so forgive any mistakes!" which just tells me the person is 1. aware that their fic is OOC and can't be assed to fix it, and 2. too lazy to proof it themselves.