transemacabre (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
transemacabre) wrote2009-09-20 09:34 pm
transemacabre) wrote2009-09-20 09:34 pm
Entry tags:
Hetalia fic: Heartbreaker, Bonebreaker (America + lots of nations)
Okay, so for this fic to make any sense whatsoever, you need to know that on the Hetalia Kink Meme one of the most popular requests is to see America being gang-raped by basically the entire cast. As in so popular there are several epic fics written on this topic. Now I'm sure you could write many psychology papers on why people would want to read about the personification of their nation being brutally raped over and over, but really, I'm here for the lulz. And nothing is lulzier to me than the thought of America (who canonically can bench-press a Volvo) being gang-raped like Jodie Foster in The Accused. So when someone posted a request for America to turn the tables on his attackers, I happily obliged.
WARNING: Inappropriate attempted rape-related humor. Lots and lots of VIOLENCE.
Water splashed him in the face. "Nuh-nuh-no, ten more minutes," mumbled America.
Someone slapped him across the face with a glove, and he snapped awake. "Huh! What! Who needs a hero?" America looked around urgently at the large crowd of nations until he noticed somewhat belatedly that the only person who appeared to be in trouble here was himself. Considering he was chained to the wall and all.
England cleared his throat and stepped forward, shoving France out of the way. "America! Listen up! Because your sinking economy is crushing all our nutsacks, we, the nations of the world, have decided that you richly deserve a brutal raping."
America blinked at him a couple of times and burst into laughter. England turned bright red and smoke shot out of his ears. "WTF!" America laughed in his face. "This a joke, right? You really got me back for that Daffy Duck incident last April Fools, didn't you Iggy. Man, you're hilarious."
"First of all," England gritted out between clenched teeth, "we agreed to never speak of the Daffy Duck incident ever again. Secondly, no, this is not a joke. We're going to use you like a tranny hooker in Bangkok --"
"Hey!" protested Thailand from somewhere in the back.
England ignored her and went on. "--and thirdly, we're going to enjoy it." He cracked his knuckles. "Or at least I am."
America wiggled his wrists inside his shackles. "All right, this isn't funny anymore. Lemme go, guys."
England caught his chin in his hand. "And this time, America, NO REACH A ROUND!"
Seeing the others advance on him with obvious evil intent, America rolled his eyes. "Now I'm missing the season premiere of World's Deadliest Babies on FOX! This is really pissing me off! Hey-hey! Hands off the goods, France!" he yelled as France began to undo his pants.
France smirked at him. "Lay back and think of England, mon cheri," he purred. He shoved his hands into America's pants.
"NO MEANS NO, MISTER!" America roared. With a single powerful jerk, he ripped the shackles, chains and all, out of the wall. Even as debris rained down on several dozen nations, France simultaneously got a knee in his crotch and an elbow in the face. He slumped to the ground in a heap.
"Like, shit," said Poland, the first to react.
America grabbed the first handy projectile, which happened to be the unconscious France, and heaved him at the first handy target, which happened to be an extremely unlucky Lithuania. Caught square in the chest by a over a hundred pounds of dead weight Gaul, Lithuania fell to the floor. Gasping for breath, he tried ineffectually to crawl out from under France.
England went to restrain America's arms, but only succeeded in getting smashed across the face by one of America's chains. A truly impressive spray of blood erupted from his nose and lips and splattered everyone within a three foot radius of him. Unfortunately, the blow didn't knock him senseless. He slumped to his knees, saying "Oh bloody hell, bloody fucking hell," over and over again uncomprehendingly.
Germany and Prussia tried to double-team America; Germany attacking the front, Prussia leaping onto his back. America kicked Germany hard enough to send him flying into the opposite wall, then simply leaned back and repeatedly smashed Prussia against the wall to his back until he heard the satisfying sound of ribs cracking. Prussia's grip around his neck slackened and he collapsed behind America, either unconscious or wisely pretending to be.
A couple of nations were bright enough to flee at this point. The Italian brothers jumped out the nearest window; a shout of "VE~" followed them the three story drop to the ground. "Help!" cried Lithuania weakly as the others stampeded over him and France in a frenzy to escape America's rampage.
Poland climbed into the window as soon as the Italies lept. "He's gone berserk, omigod! You're on your own, Liet!" he cried as he, too, jumped.
Meanwhile, America smashed a chair over China's head, and then kicked him in the gut. China curled into a ball, shaking. "All right, Kiku," America said slowly and very seriously as he regarded Japan. "You of all these idiots should've remembered what I'm capable of."
"America-san," Japan began, but America punched him in the throat before he could finish whatever he was going to say.
Russia shoved aside the smaller countries in his rush to attack America. At last, after all these decades of threats and puppet-armies, they would know the true meaning of mutually assured destruction.
"Hey, commie," America said congenially as he saw Russia fling Latvia over his shoulder like a doll. "I always knew it'd come down to you and me-- UGH!" he screamed as Russia swung his pipe and smashed him across the side of the head with all the force in his massive body. America staggered backward, almost tripping over England, clutching the side of his head. Blood leaked out from between his fingers.
Russia giggled like a madman. He lazily kicked America in the stomach, making him slump to his hands and knees. He was still desperately trying to staunch the blood flow from his scalp. "At last! Now you will learn where you belong -- on your knees," he told America and raised his pipe for another blow.
The pipe came down in a cruel arc. America's left hand snapped up and caught it just inches from his head. He wrenched upward, getting both feet under him before Russia could throw him off balance, and grasped the pipe with both his hands. "You think you can hurt me?!" America screamed into Russia's face as he drove him back, step by step, their fiendish strengths matched one against the other. Blood oozed down his temple, across one cheek and dripped down his neck. "You think I'm scared of you! Here's what you can do with your big stick, Russia -- CHOKE on it!"
He pushed Russia against the wall, pressing the pipe against Russia's esophagus with unrelenting force until Russia turned blue and gasped for air.
"You're killing him!" cried out England, who had managed to climb to his feet and was staggering across the floor towards the battling titans.
"Yeah, that's the idea," America said as Russia's eyes rolled back to show the whites.
"Take it out on me!" England told him, trying to get between them. "I'm the one who planned this! You're hurting everyone because of me!"
America kicked Russia in the chest with enough force to embed him into the wall, but lifted off the pipe and let him draw a shaky breath. "I'll keep this," he said, resting the pipe on one shoulder. He then turned to face England again. "So this rape thing was your idea?" he asked.
England was a mess. His nose was busted, and he was at least as bloody as America (the difference being that America was covered in several other people's blood other than his own). His lips were swollen to twice their usual size, which made speaking nigh-impossible right now. "Yeh-yes! I wanted to puh-punish you!"
"Punish me?" America frowned, a ghoulish sight what with the abrasions across his face and neck and the blood coating his hair. "For my economy? Because I got sick?"
"Yes!" England tried to face the end like a gentleman: resolute and brave.
America head-butted him. "FUCK YOU!" he shouted. England swayed, then toppled over. He turned back to the moaning pile of other nations, all in varying stages of injury. Someone managed a little shriek of fear at realizing that America's attention had returned to them. "And you! All of you! Don't think because England fessed up that it's over. I'm not done with you yet."
The door flew open a few moments later, and Canada ran in to see America beating Sweden with Finland. "What is going on in here?" he said. He'd run in when he saw nations leaping out the window; he'd certainly not expected to see this sight. "America, what's gotten into you?"
"Hey Mattie!" America grinned at him.
"Oh my god!" Canada gasped when he saw the state of his brother's face. He sounded on the verge of tears.
America threw an arm around his shoulder. "Heh, bad day at the office."
WARNING: Inappropriate attempted rape-related humor. Lots and lots of VIOLENCE.
Water splashed him in the face. "Nuh-nuh-no, ten more minutes," mumbled America.
Someone slapped him across the face with a glove, and he snapped awake. "Huh! What! Who needs a hero?" America looked around urgently at the large crowd of nations until he noticed somewhat belatedly that the only person who appeared to be in trouble here was himself. Considering he was chained to the wall and all.
England cleared his throat and stepped forward, shoving France out of the way. "America! Listen up! Because your sinking economy is crushing all our nutsacks, we, the nations of the world, have decided that you richly deserve a brutal raping."
America blinked at him a couple of times and burst into laughter. England turned bright red and smoke shot out of his ears. "WTF!" America laughed in his face. "This a joke, right? You really got me back for that Daffy Duck incident last April Fools, didn't you Iggy. Man, you're hilarious."
"First of all," England gritted out between clenched teeth, "we agreed to never speak of the Daffy Duck incident ever again. Secondly, no, this is not a joke. We're going to use you like a tranny hooker in Bangkok --"
"Hey!" protested Thailand from somewhere in the back.
England ignored her and went on. "--and thirdly, we're going to enjoy it." He cracked his knuckles. "Or at least I am."
America wiggled his wrists inside his shackles. "All right, this isn't funny anymore. Lemme go, guys."
England caught his chin in his hand. "And this time, America, NO REACH A ROUND!"
Seeing the others advance on him with obvious evil intent, America rolled his eyes. "Now I'm missing the season premiere of World's Deadliest Babies on FOX! This is really pissing me off! Hey-hey! Hands off the goods, France!" he yelled as France began to undo his pants.
France smirked at him. "Lay back and think of England, mon cheri," he purred. He shoved his hands into America's pants.
"NO MEANS NO, MISTER!" America roared. With a single powerful jerk, he ripped the shackles, chains and all, out of the wall. Even as debris rained down on several dozen nations, France simultaneously got a knee in his crotch and an elbow in the face. He slumped to the ground in a heap.
"Like, shit," said Poland, the first to react.
America grabbed the first handy projectile, which happened to be the unconscious France, and heaved him at the first handy target, which happened to be an extremely unlucky Lithuania. Caught square in the chest by a over a hundred pounds of dead weight Gaul, Lithuania fell to the floor. Gasping for breath, he tried ineffectually to crawl out from under France.
England went to restrain America's arms, but only succeeded in getting smashed across the face by one of America's chains. A truly impressive spray of blood erupted from his nose and lips and splattered everyone within a three foot radius of him. Unfortunately, the blow didn't knock him senseless. He slumped to his knees, saying "Oh bloody hell, bloody fucking hell," over and over again uncomprehendingly.
Germany and Prussia tried to double-team America; Germany attacking the front, Prussia leaping onto his back. America kicked Germany hard enough to send him flying into the opposite wall, then simply leaned back and repeatedly smashed Prussia against the wall to his back until he heard the satisfying sound of ribs cracking. Prussia's grip around his neck slackened and he collapsed behind America, either unconscious or wisely pretending to be.
A couple of nations were bright enough to flee at this point. The Italian brothers jumped out the nearest window; a shout of "VE~" followed them the three story drop to the ground. "Help!" cried Lithuania weakly as the others stampeded over him and France in a frenzy to escape America's rampage.
Poland climbed into the window as soon as the Italies lept. "He's gone berserk, omigod! You're on your own, Liet!" he cried as he, too, jumped.
Meanwhile, America smashed a chair over China's head, and then kicked him in the gut. China curled into a ball, shaking. "All right, Kiku," America said slowly and very seriously as he regarded Japan. "You of all these idiots should've remembered what I'm capable of."
"America-san," Japan began, but America punched him in the throat before he could finish whatever he was going to say.
Russia shoved aside the smaller countries in his rush to attack America. At last, after all these decades of threats and puppet-armies, they would know the true meaning of mutually assured destruction.
"Hey, commie," America said congenially as he saw Russia fling Latvia over his shoulder like a doll. "I always knew it'd come down to you and me-- UGH!" he screamed as Russia swung his pipe and smashed him across the side of the head with all the force in his massive body. America staggered backward, almost tripping over England, clutching the side of his head. Blood leaked out from between his fingers.
Russia giggled like a madman. He lazily kicked America in the stomach, making him slump to his hands and knees. He was still desperately trying to staunch the blood flow from his scalp. "At last! Now you will learn where you belong -- on your knees," he told America and raised his pipe for another blow.
The pipe came down in a cruel arc. America's left hand snapped up and caught it just inches from his head. He wrenched upward, getting both feet under him before Russia could throw him off balance, and grasped the pipe with both his hands. "You think you can hurt me?!" America screamed into Russia's face as he drove him back, step by step, their fiendish strengths matched one against the other. Blood oozed down his temple, across one cheek and dripped down his neck. "You think I'm scared of you! Here's what you can do with your big stick, Russia -- CHOKE on it!"
He pushed Russia against the wall, pressing the pipe against Russia's esophagus with unrelenting force until Russia turned blue and gasped for air.
"You're killing him!" cried out England, who had managed to climb to his feet and was staggering across the floor towards the battling titans.
"Yeah, that's the idea," America said as Russia's eyes rolled back to show the whites.
"Take it out on me!" England told him, trying to get between them. "I'm the one who planned this! You're hurting everyone because of me!"
America kicked Russia in the chest with enough force to embed him into the wall, but lifted off the pipe and let him draw a shaky breath. "I'll keep this," he said, resting the pipe on one shoulder. He then turned to face England again. "So this rape thing was your idea?" he asked.
England was a mess. His nose was busted, and he was at least as bloody as America (the difference being that America was covered in several other people's blood other than his own). His lips were swollen to twice their usual size, which made speaking nigh-impossible right now. "Yeh-yes! I wanted to puh-punish you!"
"Punish me?" America frowned, a ghoulish sight what with the abrasions across his face and neck and the blood coating his hair. "For my economy? Because I got sick?"
"Yes!" England tried to face the end like a gentleman: resolute and brave.
America head-butted him. "FUCK YOU!" he shouted. England swayed, then toppled over. He turned back to the moaning pile of other nations, all in varying stages of injury. Someone managed a little shriek of fear at realizing that America's attention had returned to them. "And you! All of you! Don't think because England fessed up that it's over. I'm not done with you yet."
The door flew open a few moments later, and Canada ran in to see America beating Sweden with Finland. "What is going on in here?" he said. He'd run in when he saw nations leaping out the window; he'd certainly not expected to see this sight. "America, what's gotten into you?"
"Hey Mattie!" America grinned at him.
"Oh my god!" Canada gasped when he saw the state of his brother's face. He sounded on the verge of tears.
America threw an arm around his shoulder. "Heh, bad day at the office."