Bow Chika Bow Wow WWE-style
Dec. 22nd, 2012 07:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
transemacabreIn case you haven't been following WWE, my goddess, AJ Lee, recently added Dolph Ziggler to her list of conquests. This is notable because she dumped John Cena for him, and John Cena is basically WWE's version of Superman. Pretend that Superman and, uh, Maxima actually got together, then she turned on him to hump Prometheus. Its a little like that.
I can't say that I mourn John Cena/AJ, because he kissed her the ways birds fuck: quick, perfunctory, passionless. I'm sorry y'all, but I don't buy that John Cena likes girls. I know he was married IRL for like ten years, but I don't buy it. He and Randy Orton have more legit sexual tension than him and AJ. Dolph Ziggler is an utter asshole but he and AJ can generate some scorching FoeYay. If I can't have my OTP of Kane/AJ, Dolph makes for an acceptable substitute. Just check out this video from 12/18/12, look at how AJ grasps Dolph by the head in a dominant, almost mocking manner, before they proceed to nearly copulate in the ring, while Langston watches stoically. Seriously, fast forward to about the middle of the video, where they're being filmed from the shoulders up so all you see is mouthes, bare shoulders, bare arms, and bare back, and tell me it doesn't look like a porno.
I can't say that I mourn John Cena/AJ, because he kissed her the ways birds fuck: quick, perfunctory, passionless. I'm sorry y'all, but I don't buy that John Cena likes girls. I know he was married IRL for like ten years, but I don't buy it. He and Randy Orton have more legit sexual tension than him and AJ. Dolph Ziggler is an utter asshole but he and AJ can generate some scorching FoeYay. If I can't have my OTP of Kane/AJ, Dolph makes for an acceptable substitute. Just check out this video from 12/18/12, look at how AJ grasps Dolph by the head in a dominant, almost mocking manner, before they proceed to nearly copulate in the ring, while Langston watches stoically. Seriously, fast forward to about the middle of the video, where they're being filmed from the shoulders up so all you see is mouthes, bare shoulders, bare arms, and bare back, and tell me it doesn't look like a porno.
