SJWs and IR relationships
Sep. 27th, 2011 12:11 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
transemacabreY'know, I'd have more regard for the Social Justice Warrior crew on LJ and in fandom if I didn't keep catching them saying fucked up shit about people in interracial relationships. Because... wow. Is this what people mean when they talk about "hipster racism"? I've come across SJWs saying that a white person in an IR relationship with a black person must have some kind of sick sexual fetish (because of course no white person would fall in love with a black person because of his or her personal merits! Perish the thought!). And of course, a black person loving a white person has been corrupted by The Man, and has only attached themselves to the whitey because of their own self-hatred and disdain for their own race (therefore robbing any black person who's ever been in an IR relationship of their agency and right to make their own decisions as a responsible adult).
This manages the rare feat of being incredibly insulting to both white AND black people! And mixed people, for that matter, who I'm sure have been sitting on PINS AND NEEDLES to hear a Sociology 101 graduate tell them how their parents' relationships are based on fetishization of race. Not to mention what I've seen said or implied about Mestee/MGM (multi-generationally mixed) people like yours truly, who have our own deeply complex histories -- but none of that matters because we have "passing priviledge"... which is truly like missing the forest for the trees. My ancestors didn't do passeblanc for the LULZ, but because they lived in Mississippi in one of the most racist societies that has ever existed on planet Earth. I will NEVER judge them for their choices. They did what they thought was best at the time.
Sometimes, I think what I've seen on LJ is more upsetting than the blatant racism I've encountered in person from redneck good ol' boys -- because at least the good 'ol boys never claimed to be on my side.
Allow me to quote one particularly nauseating example of what I'm talking about. A white guy posted his concerns about his dad's less-than-welcoming of his black girlfriend, and this poster (who's username I am not going to reveal to protect the dumbass) had this to say to him:
It sounds to me like you are pretty young, and you are really in to the idea of having a black girlfriend. My impression is that it makes you feel extra hip, edgy, and progressive. And writing up this drama for yourself where your dad is a huge racist makes the whole thing feel even more important and righteous. It's you against the man, man! [...] Her race isn't your story. You are an ally, but it doesn't become your fight by virtue of some kind of sexual osmosis. And a girlfriend isn't a fashion accessory or an Obama bumper sticker.
Oh, wow! What a string of assumptions. First of all, the white guy said he's in a long-term relationship with his lady love, so it's hardly a screw 'em and leave 'em disposable relationship. If he's pissy at his dad for not being nice to her, it implies he's really serious about this girl. I love how his concern for her is twisted into a lecture on how she's no more than an "Obama bumper sticker" to him. Fortunately, dumbass poster was called out by a couple of people and quickly apologized.
I guess what I'm trying to get at, is that maybe we should all be a little more respectful of people, and in the case of their personal relationships, we need to remember to mind our own damn business. And speaking only for myself, I'd really appreciate it if certain people took a long hard look at themselves. It all reminds me of a brilliant lyric from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame:
And he saw corruption everywhere except within...
This manages the rare feat of being incredibly insulting to both white AND black people! And mixed people, for that matter, who I'm sure have been sitting on PINS AND NEEDLES to hear a Sociology 101 graduate tell them how their parents' relationships are based on fetishization of race. Not to mention what I've seen said or implied about Mestee/MGM (multi-generationally mixed) people like yours truly, who have our own deeply complex histories -- but none of that matters because we have "passing priviledge"... which is truly like missing the forest for the trees. My ancestors didn't do passeblanc for the LULZ, but because they lived in Mississippi in one of the most racist societies that has ever existed on planet Earth. I will NEVER judge them for their choices. They did what they thought was best at the time.
Sometimes, I think what I've seen on LJ is more upsetting than the blatant racism I've encountered in person from redneck good ol' boys -- because at least the good 'ol boys never claimed to be on my side.
Allow me to quote one particularly nauseating example of what I'm talking about. A white guy posted his concerns about his dad's less-than-welcoming of his black girlfriend, and this poster (who's username I am not going to reveal to protect the dumbass) had this to say to him:
It sounds to me like you are pretty young, and you are really in to the idea of having a black girlfriend. My impression is that it makes you feel extra hip, edgy, and progressive. And writing up this drama for yourself where your dad is a huge racist makes the whole thing feel even more important and righteous. It's you against the man, man! [...] Her race isn't your story. You are an ally, but it doesn't become your fight by virtue of some kind of sexual osmosis. And a girlfriend isn't a fashion accessory or an Obama bumper sticker.
Oh, wow! What a string of assumptions. First of all, the white guy said he's in a long-term relationship with his lady love, so it's hardly a screw 'em and leave 'em disposable relationship. If he's pissy at his dad for not being nice to her, it implies he's really serious about this girl. I love how his concern for her is twisted into a lecture on how she's no more than an "Obama bumper sticker" to him. Fortunately, dumbass poster was called out by a couple of people and quickly apologized.
I guess what I'm trying to get at, is that maybe we should all be a little more respectful of people, and in the case of their personal relationships, we need to remember to mind our own damn business. And speaking only for myself, I'd really appreciate it if certain people took a long hard look at themselves. It all reminds me of a brilliant lyric from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame:
And he saw corruption everywhere except within...
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no subject
Date: 2011-09-27 12:36 pm (UTC)That was until one of the SJWs decided that I obviously hate interracial pairings and possibly black people as a whole, simply because I don't like a certain fictional interracial pairing.
Which must be news to my niece and nephew, both of which are biracial (their father is black), and both of whom generally spend holidays with me, because I guess I "hate" them that much? It's certainly possible that I could be racist against my own family members, but you'd think if that were the case, they'd stop volunteering to spend time with their evil racist aunt. They do have plenty of other options on both sides of their family.
So yep, that was the day that I turned off the listening dial to the SJW crew.
If I hadn't, I'm sure the well-meaning social justice nonsense on tumblr would definitely have done it. Tumblr may be the only place where wanting the right to marry my girlfriend if I choose is seen as a ~privilege~ that is ruining the cause of queer people. Or whatever.
tl;dr: not being able to see the forest for the trees is a common problem.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-27 05:43 pm (UTC)I generally have a certain amount of time for SJWs, but I think SO many of their problems can be boiled down to not assuming good faith. And not assuming good faith is just not a good idea - it makes it basically impossible to have a good conversation with anyone. And you end up telling someone in a long-term relationship to stop treating their girlfriend as an accessory, WTF.
Also, as a white girl whose first and only boyfriend (I'm 21 and bi) was black... AARGH. Fuck off. I've actually had sex with a relatively large number of black people percentage-wise, so I'm sure I would be considered this young hipster person or gross fetishist by them. I just hate that.
Besides, like... I tend to think it's a mistake to try to link anyone's sexual preferences to simplistic explanations, but it's possible my taste for tall, dominant-in-bed men is linked subconsciously to my taste for black men. Even if that's true, which I doubt, that doesn't actually invalidate my attraction to the black boys I've slept with, or our relationships. My long-standing friendship with my first boyfriend is not somehow made non-existent or use-y by my liking guys who look like him.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-27 10:48 pm (UTC)ITA 100%. Also agree that this kind of racism is, to me, worst than the blatant kind because the "good ol' boys" never claim to be "allies." Honestly, it's why I stay away from most liberal blogs these days, they end up pissing me off worst than the conservative ones.