Encyclopedia Dramatica

[transemacabre]

This article on Childfreers might be one of the most awesomely funny things I have seen yet on the 'Net.

Moos can only dream of their children growing up to become bitter, angry jerks who hate their parents and spend their time on livejournal.

Comments

[silverwhistle.livejournal.com]

They admit their sense of humour is non-PC.

I don't regard myself as 'normal' human. And I never felt as if I was a child. Children were the horrible, stupid, irrational, violent little brutes that bullied me for years. I always preferred adult company.

I'd rather take cyanide than have a child.

[transemacabre.livejournal.com]

The thing is, no one, except possibly your mom, cares if you ever have kids or not. It's the attention-whoring of childfreers that annoys me. This right here is every conversation I've ever had with a childfreer:

CF: I don't like kids and never want to have one.
Me: That's cool. If you don't like kids, it's better you never have one so you don't ruin your kid's life or your own.
CF: Omigod oppression! You think I'm less of a woman for not having babies!
Me: ???
CF: My womb doesn't belong to you, buster!
Me: I want nothing to do with your womb.
CF: I have very good reasons for staying childfree, I'll have you know. Other kids spit on me. Mommy didn't love me. Schizophrenia, autism, and tree fetishists run in my family and I don't want to pass on those genes. I don't want to spend all my money and time on some stinky, crying baby.
Me: Not having children is a personal choice. You don't have to explain yourself to me. You don't have to justify your decision to anyone.
CF: You don't respect my choice! No one respects me! Why, 5 years ago at Thanksgiving my aunt Erma asked me if I was ever having kids. See, see, I'm oppressed!
Me: ???
CF: Besides, people who do have children are selfish. Why would you want to be surrounded by a bunch of squalling crotch droppings?
Me: People have children for all sorts of reasons. Most parents love their children very much and would do anything for them. I think it's very unkind and immature of you to call children 'crotch droppings'.
CF: Omigod oppression! When will the breeder strangle-hold on humanity end!

[silverwhistle.livejournal.com]

What you get, though, especially by the time you're my age, is acquaintances, work colleagues & c, who are fretting about their own 'biological clocks' and stuff, and asking whether you are looking for someone, & c, and assuming you feel as they do. Not getting their heads around the fact that what they want is not what you want. A lot of people assume that if you're 40 and single (and, indeed, a virgin), it's not because you actually want to be. I've ended up telling other people to chill out and not make themselves look so desperate, and enjoy what they have.

[transemacabre.livejournal.com]

Your acquaintances and colleagues ought to have enough class and discretion not to pry into your personal life. There are any number of reasons why a 40-year-old single woman would have no children, both willingly or unwillingly, and none of them are any of your acquaintances' business unless they are going to be doing the magic freak dance with you sometime soon.