This is true, this is real, this is Straight Edge

Using my incredible mutant powers to see the future, I bring you Marvel's solicits from 2009!

New Avengers #43
A resurrected Jean Grey makes out with Scarlet Witch in a hot tub. What more do you want from us, fanboys? Also, Iron Man orders a hit on Sally Floyd after she tries to blackmail him with the info that he's impregnated like three of those underaged girls from the Initiative. REJOICE!

New Warriors #19
Prepare yourself, True Believers, for the debute of the NEWEST NEW NEW WARRIOR -- Mimic from the Exiles, who is now somehow alive again! Wow, full-color can hardly begin to convey the EXCITEMENT, the THRILL, of another character with no connection to the original New Warriors, with ill-defined powers, who's acting completely contrary to all of his previous depictions! Excelsior!!

Runaways #30
Okay, so yeah, it took us like 9 months to get this issue out. But hey, it's got time travel! And everybody loves that wacky time travel! Plus: Nico makes a cultural reference that's sure to be totally dated by the time this hits TPB. Believe it!

Uncanny X-Men #501
The X-Men REEL from the fallout of last issue's events, in which an ALL NEW, ALL DIFFERENT Summers child from the FUTURE was revealed! What craziness does the mutant Technopath have planned? Why has he come back in time? And he's Cable's son by an alternate universe cyborg Tony Stark! HOLY SHIT!

Thunderbolts #130
Norman Osborn assrapes Jolt, in a move sure to drive a stake through the hearts of the last remaining ol skool Tbolts fans! Umm -- WARREN ELLIS! WARREN ELLIS WARREN ELLIS WARREN ELLIS! "Nextwave" is as awesome as oral sex! WARREN ELLIS!

From a conversation on the CBR forums. Before coming out as gay in the GLA mini, Living Lightning spent a few months on an asteroid with Quasar (RIP). Just the two of them, alone, with occasional visits from Monica Rambeau and Starfox.

Keep in mind Quasar is the same hero who's own *girlfriend* wondered if he was gay.
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Lord and Savior of Historical Fiction? Uh huh.

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Shamelessly ripped off of Frank Miller.

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